Simple Twists in Reality - Part XVI

As I make my way down the first set of stairs my nerves grow. I can feel my heart flutter like the wings of a butterfly as I get closer and closer to the bottom step. The feeling is irrational as I still have another flight of stairs to go to actually reach our guests, and yet I can’t seem to breath steadily.

I pause at the bottom of the stairs and look out to the full moon, hoping it will give me strength. This is when I notice that there are tiny, pristine white flecks falling outside. The moon has a bluish hue and this only adds to the beauty of the picturesque scene out my window. I suddenly feel full of courage and bravery. Walking down some stairs seems a small feat to accomplish.

I walk around the corner and to the top of the second flight of stairs, the stairs that will lead me to the crowd of milling guests. I stand there for a moment, just looking at my feet. Then, as I realise how pathetic I must look, I hold my head high and look straight ahead as I start to descend the stairs.

The further down the stairs I go the more people start to look at me. I can feel the eyes on me, all of them staring. But at the same time, I can feel the admiration and the awe. I fell proud as I come closer and closer to the floor. I can see my father amongst the crowd. He is smiling and nodding at me. When I finally reach the bottom every eye in the room is on me.

***

Simple Twists in Reality - Part XV

When the clock chimes fifty past five my mother tells me to hurry up to my room and to stay there until she sends Catherine to get me.

I ask her why and her answer both shocks and delights me. “Elizabeth, you are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen and I want everyone to know how precious you are. I want you to enter the room by descending down the stairs, just as you did for your father, and I want it to happen when everyone is here.”

And so I wait in my room, playing with paper. Almost every five minutes I find myself glancing at the clock, wondering how long it will take mother to come and collect me. The clock reaches six thirty and I start to wonder if this was all a cruel joke and that mother just did not want the shame of having me at the party.

Finally, at quarter to seven Catherine comes up to find me. “Why has it taken so long? What is happening downstairs? Did something go wrong? Has mother decided that she does not want me to attend the party at all?”

“Maam, nofin’ like that has happened. Your mother has been waitin’ until every guest arrived. She made me write down all the names of the people who were going to attend and then check them off once they arrived. Mr Winchester seemed awful keen to see you. He arrived five minutes early and immediately asked where you were. Everyone has been waitin’. I don’t fink we should make them wait any longer.”

We share a smile and Catherine giggles. “I guess I was being a little melodramatic.” Catherine laughs again.

***

Simple Twists in Reality - Part XIV

When mother and I arrive home we discover that Catherine has been hard at work preparing the house and that she has finished the dancing hall, the lounge room, the library and the men’s smoking room. Mother walks around to check that everything looks perfect and to make slight changes. Before setting off to do this, though, she excuses Catherine and I so that we may work out my hair and Catherine may see my dress.

While walking up to my room I discover that Catherine has also decorated the stairs leading up to the third level with all our bedrooms and, to my complete shock, my bedroom. The hall on the third floor has also had the slightest decoration added to it. I ask her why and her only answer is a coy smile and subtle wink. This leaves me wondering how innocent my maid really is.

We take out my dress and Catherine helps me to put it on.

“Oh… Why Miss, I don’t fink I have ever seen anyfin’ so beautiful in my entire life! You look like somefin’ from a dream, comin’ down from heaven to save me. I have no doubt maam, that you will turn all heads tonight. You are bound to make even the most opposed and respectable men fall in love with you.”

We giggle at the prospect and then we put the dress into my wardrobe. I head back downstairs to help mother to decorate the study, leaving Catherine to think of how we will fashion my hair, to make it match my dress.

An hour later Catherine has come up with a hairstyle that we all agree looks wonderful, mother and I have finished all the decorating and Catherine has cooked us some lunch. Mother’s maid and the cook have been away for three days as Jonathan, the cook, was sick and needed surgery. The doctor, however, called us yesterday and assured us that he will be all better my midday today and that he should be home by three in the evening.

This has meant that Catherine has been working harder than ever to complete separate pieces of three jobs. Jonathan and Linda, mother’s maid, are due to arrive any minute. The party is to start at six so mother instructs Catherine to run me a bath and wash my hair. Mother clearly wants me to look my best tonight and I can’t help but wonder what the special occasion is.

I take my bath and wash my hair. The next half hour is spent with Catherine trying to dry it. Jonathan and Linda arrive back in this time and mother starts organising the dinner menu for tonight. By the time my hair is dry there is only an hour and a half until the party starts. Father is home and working on some documents, Jonathan is slow roasting the lamb that we are going to have tonight, and Linda is helping mother to get ready.

Catherine gets me into my dress and starts on my hair. It takes her around half an hour to get it to perfection and it looks lovely. Pins that have delicate, silver butterflies on the end, hold most of my hair together, flowing up in a large bun and the remainder is out. My hair is very long and reaches down to the small of my back. Catherine has arranged it so that most is at the back but a small amount hangs over my right shoulder.

Catherine claims that I could not look more beautiful if God himself had dressed me. I smile and tell her that she is being far too kind.

I walk to my jewellery box and take out the earrings that Lewis gave me for my birthday. They look absolutely marvellous with my dress. Now all that is needed is a necklace. I find a simple silver chain with a sapphire surrounded by gold. My father gave this to me on my sixteenth birthday and it matches both my earrings and my dress.

By the time I am completely ready there is only half an hour remaining until the guests start to arrive and mother is impatiently waiting at my door for me to come out. I tell her to get father and wait below the second storey stairs. She is very unhappy about being made to wait but knows enough to do as I ask. When she comes back to tell me they are ready I wait a minute for mother to get back into position and then make my way down the flight of stairs.

My heart skips when I see their faces. My father has always loved me and told me I was beautiful, being the closest and kindest of my parents. Mother has always seemed distant, saddened that she did not have a boy. Usually it is the other way around. But now… now my mother really looks like nothing, not even a son, could match this moment.

“Darling, You look beautiful! You are an angel! How is it possible that all this time I have seen my young little daughter, and only now I can see that she has grown into a beautiful woman? Come here my child! Let your father get a good look at you.” I am so grateful for my father. He always knows when to be supportive and what to say. I do not know what I would do without him.

Mother looks at me for a moment, saying nothing but looking. Then she says, “Elizabeth, I have never been so proud of you. I don’t care if you do not get an offer of marriage tonight, or for the next month, or even the next year. You are the most beautiful young woman I have ever seen and if young men cannot see through the fog that blinds them, and ask you to dance at least, then they are not worthy of such beauty,”

I walk swiftly to my mother and fold into her arms. I have never felt like a piece to be treasured in my mother’s collection. Not until now. And the way my father looks at me, as though if he were to touch me the spell will be broken and I will turn back into his young, innocent daughter, is worth all the trouble that Amanda put into making this dress. I will have to make sure that I give her something special.

***

Simple Twists in Reality - Part XIII

We arrive at the fitters and find that Amanda has spent almost all night working on the beading to make sure that it is ready for me today. I hug the breath out of her, knowing my actions will be frowned upon, and thank her immensely for all that she has done. She says it will be worth it when everyone sees me tonight, telling me that the only thing that could possibly make it better would be if she got to see me, and everyone’s faces when they did the same.

Amanda leads me into a fitting room just to make sure that everything is perfect. Amanda has always been a lovely person and we have been good friends ever since I met her.

When I finally get the dress on I find that I have never seen a garment that looked as beautiful as the one I am wearing. Amanda says that I look like an angel dressed in the night sky. She claims that nothing I have worn before has made me look so beautiful. The dark midnight blue of the dress brings out the paleness of my skin and also makes my long, dark brown, gently curled hair look like that of a goddess. I cannot thank Amanda enough but I try never the less.

Mother asks if she can come in and see but I insist that she must wait until tonight to see me, as a surprise. I can tell by her tone that she is unhappy about this but she agrees never the less. I know that she will like it but I do not want to see Amanda embarrassed by having to explain that the design is not one of the house’s but instead one I have made myself. I will save her that agony.

***

Simple Twists in Reality - Part XII

By lunchtime we have finished the dinning room, the stairs, the parlour and the second story hall. The place is filled with silver and gold along with lovely ornaments. The decorations are all working together to make the house look even more splendid than it usually does.

Mother and I leave to go and collect my dress and Catherine continues to decorate, using the rooms we have already done and mother’s instructions as a guideline for how it should be done. I trust her explicitly.

***

Simple Twists in Reality - Part XI

I wake up in the morning to find my mother sitting on the end of my bed, talking to herself. I greet her and she seems slightly flustered.

“Elizabeth,” she starts. Great, I can already tell that we are going to have a discussion about last night. And, most likely, the discussion will turn into an argument as mother tells me all the terrible things about Lewis. “You don’t really think that Lewis was being serious about proposing to you do you? I mean, it was just a joke? Right? And if he did propose… You wouldn’t say yes, would you?”

“Mother! Why would it be so bad if Lewis did propose to me anyway? You seem so keen to get an offer of marriage for me from almost any eligible man in the city, but when it comes to Lewis. He is a man from a good family, with a good title and a reasonable fortune. What more could you want?”

“But Elizabeth dear, he is not reasonable! He does not do what is respectable. He would make you look like a fool if you were to marry him. He would never give you the kind of social life that one of your reputation and position should have! You must see that.”

“No mother I do not see that. I like Lewis. He makes me laugh and I enjoy his company. I can be myself around him. I don’t have to pretend to be the perfect young lady that so many believe me to be. All the men you want me to marry can’t even suck up the courage to come and talk to me let alone propose. I have not had a decent conversation with any of the men that you deem ‘eligible’!”

“But dear, they are just shy. You must give them time, to warm up to you.”

“Mother, they have had 18 years to warm up to me. If they cannot yet even talk to me then they will never be able to. I am not going to marry a man that won’t even say hello. And speaking of respectable, are you saying that the way Michael fools around with other young women is respectable?”

“Oh Elizabeth, that is just a rumour! Michael is a lovely young man, and speaking of which you should not have sent him away and refused to go to the ballet with him. It was a very generous offer and I am sure that after that it is not likely to come again. You should have been more kind.”

“Oh really mother! We both know that it was not Michael speaking but his mother. Michael would never have come over if it were not for his mother insisting! And anyway…”

“Elizabeth I have no interest in arguing with you! I am getting tired of you being so headstrong. Just promise me that you will make an effort with Michael and Henry tonight? Now, I am going to work with Catherine to get the decorations out and start embellishing the house for tonight. I am sure that you can get dressed yourself? I will meet you downstairs when you are ready.”

Mother leaves the room and that is the end of it. We have sorted out none of our problems. Now, not only am I mad with her but I am also left to ponder over what happened last night and what may happen tonight. Will Lewis say anything about last night or add to it? And what will Michael do? Is what he said yesterday true? Will he ignore me? After what I said to him I would not be surprised if he just avoided me the entire time.

I take my time to get ready, choosing a plain dress to wear for the set up. Mother and I are going to pick up my dress from the fitters at midday and until then we are all helping with the decorations. I am thinking gold but of course mother has the last say on the matter.

When I finally make my way downstairs Catherine has made a collection of boxes filled with decorations in the parlour and mother is telling her where she wants them to go. Mother has already decorated the hall, with silver and gold fabric hanging loosely from the ceiling in alternate colours. It does look quite lovely and I am sure the whole house will end up looking marvellous.

I join mother and Catherine, and we all get to work on the dining room.

***

Simple Twists in Reality - Part X

When we arrive Lewis is there to meet us and, though my mother gives him a chilling stare, he seems only too happy to see us. We head for their parlour, filled with stuffed chairs and decorative lamps. We sit down and are given the option of cakes as a starter along with some cheese and bread. Lewis’ father, Nicholas, is away on important business in England and will not be back for another three days, so we are deprived of his company.

Lewis sits next to me on a rather small couch and mother sends me a warning glance, though I already know that Lewis is too close. He has always been like that, never abiding by the rules of respectability and pushing the limits.

I suspect that is one of the reasons that we get along so well, he is not uptight like so many of the other young men that travel in our social circle.

Maria, Lewis’s mother, and Victoria, his younger sister, walk in to the room and we engage in a conversation about respectable families. It is so nice to be able to see Victoria again. We have always been good friends and on more than one occasion I have helped Victoria with things. Her reputation is almost as good as mine and we spend much time together. I have missed her greatly since she went to spend four months with her English family, learning how to be a true lady. She has promised to teach me everything she has learnt. I cannot wait to have some time alone with her and hear all about her adventure.

Our conversation soon turns into a chat about how I must be in want of a good husband and of whom would be the best choice. Victoria and I share a look of discomfort and annoyance. Both of us have heard this conversation far too many times, with either of us being the subject. Mother immediately brings up Michael, saying he is most respectable and has a good position in society.

“I have never liked Michael. He is so self-absorbed and he is rude all the time.” Lewis, speaks up, surprising everyone in the room, except, it seems, his sister.

“Oh really darling. You just don’t like the fellow because he gets all the girls and leaves you none. Don’t mind Lewis. He and Michael never got off to the right start.”

“No, really mother. He fools around with girls as though they are not people, he is rude to everyone as though we are all beneath him, and he spends much of his time looking at things that he knows he can’t have, such as you Elizabeth.”

I am so shocked by the conversation that I can’t think of a single thing to say.

“Well… Elizabeth’s father does like the idea of Henry Rutherford as well. He is most charming and is related to English royalty, did you know?” Mother is clearly trying to steer the conversation toward a more agreeable subject without changing the topic.

“Mr. Rutherford is a very respectable and well off man. He could make you quite happy, Elizabeth. I would go for him over Michael any day.” I appreciate Victoria trying to soften the topic and create a more peaceful discussion.

“Henry? You have got to be joking Ri! As if Henry Rutherford could make Elizabeth happy. He is far too sensible and strait. He looks and acts as though he has a piece of lead pipe for a spinal chord. Not to mention that he would stop her visits to the theatre as soon as was possible.” I now feel particularly uncomfortable having been referred to in the third person.

Lewis continues, “There is not one man in this city that deserves such a woman as you, Elizabeth. They all have fatal flaws and are not worthy of such a perfect companion.” I have to put all my concentration into not staring and having my jaw drop to my feet, which is incredibly difficult.

“None except you Lewis, I suppose,” his mother says.

“Well, now that you bring it up, yes. None of the men here are worthy of you but, if I was given the honour, I would most certainly take the prize jewel of this city’s female youth, and would try my utmost to be worthy of the privilege bestowed.”

As always my mother comes through for me and ruins the moment of absolute shock by saying, “Well Lewis, though you may feel that you are the only man worthy of Elizabeth’s hand in marriage she must still find herself a respectable husband, and as you have no intention of asking for her hand in marriage, I think it reasonable that we should discuss other prospects.”

“Well… no. I would gladly offer Miss Elliot a marriage proposal if I believed it to be welcome. There are many men within this hell hole who have their eye on your becoming daughter and who is to say that I am not one of them?” Well, that shut my mother up. Problem is that is that it has also shocked Ms Winchester and I into silence.

“Why don’t we head into the dining room and see what cook has made for us?” I cannot express my gratitude to Victoria enough and as soon as mother, Maria and Lewis start to leave I hurry over to her and take her arm in mine.

“Thank you!” I whisper.

“Don’t mention it. I apologise for my brother. He is very passionate about you finding a good and responsible man to take care of you. I don’t believe he thinks your mother is up to the task, though he does trust your father more. You must forgive him for his behaviour.”

The remainder of the evening passes without further mention of this topic. The whole evening is rather uncomfortable in truth, as no one wants to say what their thoughts are on Lewis’ earlier comment, however, no one can stop thinking about it. Mother seems relieved when it comes time for us to leave. She reminds the family that they are all expected to be coming tomorrow night and that the whole evening will be great fun.

I thank Ms Winchester for inviting us over for such a lovely dinner and give Victoria a well-deserved hug. We leave without further conversation. As we leave I can hear Maria and Lewis having a heated discussion over what was mentioned throughout the evening.

Mother and I pass the carriage ride home in silence, neither of us wishing to say anyhting. When we get home father inquires as to how the dinner went and I make my way straight to my bedroom where I spare no time in getting ready for bed.

***